La Cocina

"If God dwells inside us like some people say, I sure hope he likes enchiladas." - Jack Handy

Disclaimer: The appearance of God in this week's quote isn't meant to coincide symbolically with either the rise of Christ or the descent of leavened bread. The LLC is resolute in its separation of church and lunch policy (regardless of whether we eat on State St).

Readers, do you recall The Loop Lunch Club's recent visit to Pollito's Grill and Rotisserie? Of course you do. Well, then imagine there was another mexican restaurant that, outside of color scheme, was exactly the same and was located just next door at 45 N Wells. Same local artwork, same layout, same menu, only it's called La Cocina. I realize that you don't routinely visit this blog for my in depth culinary analysis so instead of copy and pasting the Pollito's post I'll treat you to a few hundred cleverly arranged words that recount The LLC experience and La Cocina. Vamanos!

Behind the wall painted to look like a classic Ofman
household beach towel you can see a woman leaving
Pollito's

The festive music and bright orange walls made sitting at La Cocina feel like being in the studio audience of a south of the border Nickelodeon game show. To keep with the youthful atmosphere I couldn't help but order an imported bottle of Mexican Coca-Cola. Congratulations are due to the branding team and Coca-Cola, for even me, a cynical, media savvy consumer tasted it and thought, "This tastes like a nostalgic bit of Americana." Did I mention La Cocina esta al lado de Pollito's? Si? Bueno. In fact, I could see inside of Pollito's from where I sat at La Cocina (right). I almost attempted this entire paragraph in spanish but decided that instead of butchering spanish vocabulary and syntax I'd stick with bending the rules of English grammar.

While the food at La Cocina is authentic the prices aren't necessarily so. As Steve "Late" Lake pointed out (after arriving late), the digital menu reflects changes that are yet to be adjusted on the physical, old school analog menu. Despite the confusion I'm glad they upgraded because I've been trying to find more ways to look at screens in my day to day life.

Godfathers Rob Anderson and Dan Ofman, along with myself, caved under the pressure of a rapidly expanding line and left the table prior to the arrival of some LLCers. "Pretty standard," said Anderson after reviewing the, well, pretty standard options. Menu items are available individually or as part of a dinner combination. I asked my colleagues what constituted a dinner and Ofman explained, "Rice and beans," and then offered some brotherly guidance, pointing out these sides were "a must." Anderson then mumbled with religious solemnity, "very important."

It's a good thing Nikitas isn't still with The LLC, or he would most
certainly have hit his head on the low end of the ceiling 

La Cocina's staff works quickly to keep the line moving. One man is engaged in a perpetual battle of logistics trying to minimize wasted space and ensure that any available surface area is utilized. His main prerogative is maintaining La Cocina's violation of maximum occupancy laws. Although he saved us from the drafty table by the door and delivered some prompt (though scarce) tortilla chips, he was understandably frustrated with our empty chairs. "Are you sure you're going to be six?" He asked several times as we waited on Late Lake and Dan "Delayed" Spira. "Isn't it tough to deal with people who are consistently late?" Asked an unnamed LLC member who had run out of slack for Late Lake's lack of timeliness.

As much as I touted The Proprietor at Taza for excellent customer service I have to credit the man behind the counter at La Cocina for an equally impressive job. What he lacked in jokes and free falafel he made up for by single handedly moving the line. Watching him multitask was poetry. His arms moved so fast it was as though he had as many as an elderly saguaro. Don't let that last analogy make you think he was a prick, though. Zing!

The food arrived right away for most of us. Fittingly, Late Lake got his last following a comment about how much he wanted to eat it. "Ask and you shall receive," said three-time guest Eric Moore. Moore went on to describe salsa as "Mexican ketchup."

Eric Moore's Morsels

"In addition to the line," Said Spira, airing his grievances, "they need something to put salsa in." I didn't try either variety of salsa. Spira was right, for I would have tried both if there were a dish to put them in. I did however get a chance to eat my enchiladas dinner, and while it was good I thought it could have been more dynamic. With so many unique ingredients I was looking for a medley of flavors and found more of a singular note. Each bite was good, but each bite was also the same. I was bored with it by the end.

Clean plates were commonplace at our table. From Dan "I'm partial to a good burrito-I love burritos" Ofman's burrito to Danny "Health Kick" Rubenstein's taco salad everyone seemed pleased with the food.

"I thought the food was good," Said Spira.

Here's an unrelated video of me throwing a couch off of a building...

Notas de La Cocina:

• My initial worries concerning the number of hipsters were unfounded. By the time we left Spira was the hippest guy there.
• "Can we note it's too loud in here?" Said Steve "Man Made" Lake as he spilled his water loudly.
• I really picked on Steve this week. Sorry buddy.