Jason's Deli

"Without ice cream, there would be darkness and chaos." - Don Kardong

And on the 12th week, out of the darkness and chaos that was The LLC, Jason's Deli said, "Let there be ice cream!" The national chain's new loop location at 195 N Dearborn was my selection for this week's meeting, and I was quite pleased with the sandwich shop that's famous for offering free soft serve with every meal.

"Ice cream is exquisite - what a pity
it isn't illegal." - Voltaire

While the ice cream service was soft the staff's service was anything but, as at one time I was able to count 28 employees from my seated vantage point. The experience at Jason's is like dining in a post recession utopia where jobs and ice cream abound. Jason's benefits from a great location that is only a half block from every el line in the loop. It's like the pot of gold at the end of the CTA rainbow, only instead of gold the pot is filled with chocolate/vanilla swirl. Gold and ice cream being the only commodities remaining in the market that hold value make it a pretty even tradeoff.

My Deli Club was served with a fork.
What could I use it for?

For the single members of The LLC Jason's could have been a great place to meet young women, if not for the fact that not one of us so much as glanced at the salad bar a single time. However, I did overhear a woman sitting behind us comment about her panini and side salad, "This could be my new favorite place!" She then continued, "And look at that adorable young man, I bet he writes a fantastic blog."

After ordering we were given Table Trackers that allowed our staff to keep tabs on our location throughout the restaurant. These devices were new to me and I feared they contained the technology to steal my identity, or worse, subscribe me to Jason's email fan club.  thankfully the technophobes of The LLC were appeased by an incredibly simple explanation and we were able to eat lunch knowing both our inboxes and sandwiches would be free of spam.

General restaurant etiquette states that a fountain drink is bottomless and may be refilled by the costumer at any time. Jason's took it one step further as staff came by to individually put in the footwork on fountain drink refills. Beyond that they provide a sizable, solidly constructed glass for water instead of the inadequate Styrofoam alternative.

My Deli Club had two qualities that would bring me back to Jason's. For one, it tasted great. More importantly it was properly proportioned for a human mouth to take in. Too often one encounters a club sandwich that simply isn't fit for comfortable consumption.  Unlike many Americans today who would happily bite off more than they can chew (see below), I'd rather bite off slightly less than my maximum mouthful and avoid the aching post lunch mandible that comes with over extension.

Rob prepares to eat my weight in muffaletta

Across the table things became slightly muffled while I was enjoying my sensible bites. A complex joint muffaletta order between Rob Anderson and Dan Ofman was bungled miserably due to Dan's extreme distaste for olives. "I'll tell you the best part of a muffaletta," said Rob as Nick Nikitas shoveled stray bits of pastrami atop his potato chip in what must have been a delicious combination of savory and salty flavors. "It's the sesame seeds, I love sesame seeds."

Crisis Chris, however, believes the olive mix topping is the best part, explaining, "It's what makes it a muffaletta."

By the time The LLC had finished eating the line had extended from counter to door, creating a human barricade between us and our free ice cream. It turns out human barricades are friendly and accommodating and we passed through it easily and proceeded to each use a unique technique while operating the soft serve dispenser. Congregating outside, Dan Ofman, always eager to pose a hypothetical involving over/unders, expressed concern over how many "ice cream casualties" we would suffer on the walk back to work. "None," Rob answered quickly, "we are adults." Dan then drooled on his sweatshirt.

I'd like to conclude this week's entry by congratulating Nick Nikitas on accepting a new job that will soon take him to Milwaukee. With this unforeseen career change comes a scheduling crisis for The LLC that will result in an accelerated final four weeks. So hold on to your hats folks, and keep checking in for more Pulitzer worthy reviews!

Jason's Notes:

• Absence of Dan Spira, 10 minute crisis text from Chris
• Upon arrival Chris announced approval of the quality of paper stock used in the menus
• Rob's display of quickness and accuracy when winning the pickle trivia will never be equaled
• Have I mentioned the free ice cream?